"Year of Yes" Shonda Rhimes- A pledge we should all take!

I recently read the newly released book by Shonda Rhimes “Year of Yes”. Rhimes is the creator and writer of “Grey’s Anatomy,” “Scandal” and “How to Get Away with Murder.” I was so inspired and motivated by her story that I just had to share.

It never occurred to me that someone the likes of Shonda Rhimes, having three of the most popular televisions programs on air at this time, struggled with self-confidence, among many other things. She was shy, introverted and never said yes to anything. She begins by recalling what ultimately led to her “Year of Yes”. She was in the kitchen with her sister reciting all the invitations she had received to speak here and there, when her sister asked, “Well, are you going to go?” to where Rhimes responded by saying “Well of course not.” In her mind, that was obvious, after all, she had things to take care of, her kids, her home, not to mention that she had three TV programs to run. This left her sister uttering six little words that would change the course of Shonda’s life, “You never say YES to anything.”

Her sister’s words haunted her days after, and so she decided to take action; Shonda decided that for the next year she was going to say YES to everything! Following through 100%, Shonda said good-bye to her fear of public speaking, she said hello to making time for her kids, which included not working on the weekends and turning off her phone after 7pm, and she said good-bye to 127 lbs.

She has said that she is not the same person following the “Year of Yes,” a practice she is upholding even now, after “her year” is over.

The take away here is the same as always, look inward. In what ways are you like Shonda. In what ways have you been saying no to things that could ultimately, drastically change your life? If you know exactly what that is, then do as she has done, and start saying yes because the result could be life altering, in the best way possible.

This is my new pledge for the upcoming year, to say yes to everything that scares me. Like Rhimes, I have an incredible fear of public speaking, which I believe is holding me back professionally. I know that once I release that fear, opportunities will start to flood my way, and I can’t wait! So take the challenge, begin now, or prep up for the start of 2016 and decide that this will be the year that your life will change!

Till Next Time!

 

 

Is This All There Is To Life?

Have you ever asked yourself, is this it? Is this all there is? Is this the best I have to offer? If you have, most definitely the answer to that question is no, it is not “it”.

Often times we feel guilty for even asking the above questions because a lot of us are considered to be the “lucky” ones. After all, we have our health, a happy family, money, and and…. the list could go on and on. However, just because you want more does not mean that you are taking all those amazing things you already have for granted. It simply means that you are ready to expand and add to your life.

It is in our nature to move through time yearning for progress, and questioning what we have or how far we’ve come is our soul’s attempt to wake us up, to alert us that as long as we are here, we are not done. Some of us seek to progress in our careers, or in our personal relationships or simply progress as a human being. There’s no reason to feel guilty over this. You can have an immense gratitude for your life and for the people in it, and still want more. Your desire to want “more” will never stop, so might as well stop the struggle and lean into it.

There are three simple steps you can take starting today that will help get you going:

1.    Stop the Guilt: Freely ask, seek, and go for what you want without feeling badly about it. After all, you have what you have now (love, money, career) because at some point you decided you wanted those things. In the same way, ask now, guilt free.

2.     Make a small change: If you want to see a difference in your life then you MUST do something different, either by way of thinking differently or by taking action. Trust this, as long as you are doing the same thing day after day, nothing will change.

3.      Decide: it is imperative that your decision to take action is non-negotiable. You must commit that you will make one small change each day until you reach your set goal. You will know if you’re serious about your decision, if you stick with it. Tony Robins puts it this way, “A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.”

Most of the time, the above questions stem from some monotony that is occurring in our lives, for example, you wake up each day at the same time, drive to work the same way, go to lunch at the same place, go to bed at the same time. Routines such as these dull the soul and your purpose here on earth. Don’t get stuck, don’t wear blinders in this life time or you just might miss the best life you could have lived.

 Till Next Time!

 

How to Tackle the Impossible Task

Have you ever had a major “must do” that you’ve been avoiding because you can’t possibly imagine how it is going to get done? Yeah. Me too...

However, if you were lucky enough to successfully come out on the other side of that dilemma, I hope that you discovered one thing. That no matter how difficult a task may be, the only way to get through it is to do it. To take action. I am certain that while you were in that moment, working toward the completion of the given task, you had several thoughts along the way.

1.       It’s not as hard as I thought

2.       I can’t believe I’m actually doing it

3.       I can’t believe I did it

There is no bigger satisfaction than to tackle what once seemed unattackable (not a word, but it’s okay) and better yet, to have destroyed it! (in a good way).

Those experiences should serve as huge reminders for you as you charge after your big goals. This is how everyone else who has reached major goals has done it. The big minds of the world didn’t accomplish life changing things because they thought it was easy. They accomplished their goal because they knew that on the other side of their uncertainty greatness awaited.

So if you’re in the middle of something that you want to tackle, whether it’s starting a new business or cleaning out your closet, I have two tips to help you get a move-on.

1.       First, decide that you will do it. This is non-negotiable.

2.       Second, take action. No matter what, do not do another thing until you start right then taking action. If you want to start a business but you have no idea where to start, then your action could be “researching” your topic. If it’s cleaning out your closet, start with one piece of clothing at a time.

That’s it! How simple is that. Once you decide that you will do it NO MATTER WHAT, and you take the first step, something magical happens. Ideas you didn’t have suddenly pop in your head. And where you first thought “there’s no way” a way will be made. Before you know it, it will be done.

I don’t know the exact science behind this miraculous process, all I know is that it works. You just have to decide you will and the rest will follow.

Till next time!

What Is Preventing You From Going For IT

I had an interesting observation today.  My entire life, I’ve been surrounded by people that in one way or another, “want” something, but aren’t going for it. Why is that? Why aren’t we all just going for it?

Often times, these desires are usually dead in the water because they have been inundated by excuses. But excuses aren’t to blame, instead, lets look at the real reason the excuses came up to begin with. Let me sum it up in one sentence. We simply don’t BELIEVE.

Really think about it, think about anything that you want, and then ask yourself why don’t you have it. At first, the excuses will come up:

1. I don’t have the money.
2. I don’t have the time.
3. I’m too fat, too ugly, too old, too_______ whatever you’re “too” is.

But if you really chunk those excuses down, you’ll discover that the truth is that you don’t BELIEVE. I’ll give you my example in hopes that you can unlock your own blocks.

Me: I want to write for a living.

You: So write then.

Me: Yeah, well you see, I have a good paying job. I don’t think I can make money unless I get a major publishing deal. And, I’m busy, you know with school, work and stuff. And, and, and.

I could go on forever… But the truth is, that when I chunk it down, the reason I haven’t made writing the way in which I make money is because I don’t believe I can write. Yes, casual writing sure. But writing for a living, for other people, to be under deadlines, to be told what to write all the time… Now that, I can’t do. And so, I wallow in my stories, because they keep me safe. Miserable. But safe. The truth is, if I believed I could write, there would be nothing stopping me from applying at that great company, or going after that one great opportunity. Nothing, and I mean nothing would stop me.

If you’re not quite convinced of what I’m saying, or how it could possibly apply to you, how bout if I share a quick story with you.  

As a man was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a small rope tied to their front leg. No chains, no cages. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime, break away from their bonds but for some reason, they did not.

He saw a trainer nearby and asked why these animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away. “Well,” trainer said, “when they are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them and, at that age, it’s enough to hold them. As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free.”

The man was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their bonds but because they believed they couldn’t, they were stuck right where they were.

Belief in what we can and can’t do is the catalyst that moves us toward our desired goal. I’ve said this before, but we must be like Jim Carey, and be a Yes Man when it comes to taking chances. But most of all, we must first believe we can, believe that we are good enough just as we are. This is a reminder to you, and me. We are a work in progress, and perfection is not needed to embark on our deepest desires.  

Till Next Time.

 

How to Really Use The Law Of Attraction So You Can See Results

Today I have a really awesome little nugget for you. I was listening to Dr. Joe Dispenza, a Researcher, Chiropractor, Lecturer and Author and was mesmerized by his scientific explanation on how to apply the Law of Attraction. If you want to listen to him, just do a quick search on YouTube and tons of videos will come up. Do yourself a favor and listen.

In the meantime, I’ll give you the highlights of the particular message I listened to, which was truly transformative.  Dr. Dispenza stated that these four actions determine the life that you are currently living:

THE WORDS THAT YOU SAY

 

CREATE THE THOUGHTS THAT YOU THINK

 

THE THOUGHTS THAT YOU THINK, CREATE A FEELING

 

THAT FEELING, CREATES YOUR LIFE

 

BAMB! I don’t know why this time it clicked, but it did.

I know what you’re thinking, “Yeah-yeah, I’ve heard this before!”  I know! Me too. Tons of times. But something in his explanation finally hit a nerve and I immediately began to work. Feeling energized and wanting to prove to myself and others that this works, I dove in and meticulously dissected my words, my thoughts and my feelings.   Afterward, I took several steps to ensure that I would successfully accomplish a positive outcome on two particular areas of my life. And what transpired in the days that followed was mind blowing! All I can say is that this method works.

So now here’s my offer to you, oh devoted readers…if you want to achieve a certain goal in your life and you’ve tried and tried and it hasn’t worked, I believe there’s something you’re not tapping into. And I know how to get it out of you. I can help you understand why you’re not getting what you want.

If you would like to dig deeper and get results, private message me on my Facebook, Twitter, or, if we are friends and you know my number, you can text me J. I want to help!!

I’m telling you that on Day 7 of applying this method correctly, an awesome opportunity arose, and just like they say happens, it was more than I had asked for. Now, I am still in the midst of applying and seeing results, I am not a finished product, but, nevertheless, the name of the game is progress. As long as there’s progress in the right direction, then that’s what matters!

So today I challenge you to do it and prove to yourself that this works. Start seeing progress. What do you have to lose? Nothing! But, you have everything to gain from this experiment. If you really want to see a particular area of your life improve, reach out to me and I’ll guide you through the simple steps you can take to make it happen. There’s no way it won’t work if you just apply it correctly.

Till Next Time My Devoted Readers!

What Have You Been Telling Yourself You Can’t Do?

Jack Canfield told the story on how he was a student at one of Tony Robbins' seminars, one where he was required to walk on fire. He thought he couldn’t do it because he was convinced he would burn himself. Well, he summoned the courage to do it, the outcome was that he didn’t burn himself. So he then started to analyze the following question, what else have I been telling myself that I can’t do? Once he got the questions and answers, he started doing them.  How awesome is that! He wrote a book regarding the act of asking, The Aladdin Factor.

He referenced another story, he said he was getting ready to do a television appearance and the makeup artist was preparing him for TV. He then asked her, what is your dream? She said, “I want to own my own salon one day.” He then proceeded to ask, “What are you doing to reach that goal?” After a few seconds she said, “Nothing.”

I bet that for the exception of maybe a few of you out there, you are in the same spot as the makeup artist. You have a goal­­­—a dream you want to achieve, but you are doing zero toward it. And, the problem may be that you didn’t even realize it. You might not have known that your desires are solely living in your head, and that in order to achieve them, you actually need to plan, and take action. Don’t worry though, I’m here to help you get started. The following are few steps that can help you identify and then tackle what you want.

·         First: Identify and list all the lies you’ve been telling yourself that you could never do

·         Second: Identify why you want the things that are on your list

·         Third: Decide which one you’re going to do first

 

·         Fourth: Device a plan of action

 

·         Fifth: Everyday, do at least one thing on your action plan

Now, don’t just read this and go about your marry-way. Really listen and do it, if you do, there is NO WAY you won’t reach your desired goals.

Till Next Time!

How to Make Sure You Don't Miss Out On Your Life

I’m sure that you’ve heard people say how important it is to live in the now; if you haven’t, well you’re in luck, I’m about to summarize it for y’all. 

In Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now he explores the very subject of living in the now, and the power and freedom that come with it. If you’re confused as to exactly what I’m referring to, I’ll use the same example that most people use when trying to explain this topic. Have you ever driven to work, or school, or anywhere, but you don’t remember how you got there? Well that my friends, is a prime example of living anywhere else, but in the now.

 

Realizing that most of my life is lived just as the example suggests, I decided to try a new approach. I went for a walk the other day, and instead of thinking about the million things I think about, I decided to just focus on my walk, on what was happening right before me, and what I found was peace. I discovered that this business of "being in the now" is simply another form of meditation… (so for all those who claim you can’t meditate, try being in the now).  My mind became clear from clutter, and the headache that was threating to take over my day, disappeared without having to take a single pill. I know this is going to sound a bit fufu and out there, but here it goes anyway. On my walk,  I actually paid attention and I listened to the birds chirping. I heard the wind rustle the leaves. I inhaled and exhaled deeply, fully allowing relaxation to be part of my walk.  I felt, really felt the wind against my face, and it felt amazing. But most importantly, I thought of nothing, and it felt great. 

 

















After this simple exercise I asked myself, am I never in the now? Am I really that distracted that I’m missing my entire life because I’m consumed with thoughts of the past or the future? Well, unfortunately the answer is yes, as I fear will be the same for you. But I also realized this, that for those brief moments when I have actually managed to be in the now, those are the moments that have created my perception of life.  For example, when I’m writing, I think of nothing else except for what I’m writing about. When I’m spending time with my family, usually, I’m listening to their conversations, I’m absorbing our time together because I am keenly aware that I our time together is limited. Those two things have become precious things in my life. For you, it may be something else. It may be that when you’re running you really pay attention to your stride, the way your feet hit the pavement, not so smooth that time, so you adjust (this means you're present).  Living in the present promises a better quality of life. A life that you won’t miss. A life that you were an active party in. A life where you count your blessings everyday because you are deeply aware of all that you have.

So starting today, if you’re stirring the pot, just stir the pot.
 

Till Next Time!