What do you say to yourself?

Consider this for a moment. E-Event + R-Response = O- Outcome. This is the formula Jack Canfield uses to explain how YOU have the biggest influence over yourself.

This means that if you pay attention to what you say to yourself once the other person stops talking, you could possibly eliminate most disagreements from your life.

Jack Canfield offers an example similar to this.

Let's say someone calls you an idiot.

You can respond in two ways.

1. You can ignore what they said all together and tell yourself that they must be having a bad day.

OR

2. You can engage in a very unpleasant argument.

Both of these "outcomes" had little to do with the other person calling you an idiot and much to do with what YOU said to yourself AFTER they STOPPED talking.

Let's give an example of the kind of thing you might have been saying to yourself after the other person called you an idiot.

1. Your inner voice: First, you laugh and walk away. You tell yourself that they must be having a bad day and you don't think about it again. The rest of your day goes just as planned and you have a beautiful and fun day.

OR

2. Your inner voice: You give them a dirty look. and tell yourself, I'm not stupid,  I'm very smart. They need to speak clearly. They need to explain things better. Maybe I am stupid. Was I even paying attention to them. Is it me or them. No it is me. Maybe I am an idiot. I have a hard time following people sometimes. and so on and so on..... Without realizing it, this argument leads to more arguments with random people, the plans you had for the day totally change and now your day is ruined.

In either of these examples, the EVENT had nothing to do with the outcome. It was what you said to yourself that resulted in the OUTCOME.

Therefore, next time an event occurs in your life that seems to take you sideways, stop for a second to try and reflect on what just happened. Try to see if the outcome could have been different had you responded differently to the event.

Till next time my friends.

Imagine your beliefs guaranty you can never get to where you want to go!

This one is going to be a short one. I just want to say one thing, Tony Robbins is a genius! He posed the question, Imagine your beliefs guaranty you can never get to where you want to go.

Let me put it this way; let us say for a second that you really want to win the lotto.

But you also have the belief that if you win the lotto something awful is bound to happen to your family. And of course you don’t want this. 

Well your belief that something awful is going to happen is so true to you and so devastating that no matter how many times you play the lotto you WILL NEVER WIN.

Let me give you another example: (for those of you who have the odds of winning the lotto already calculated in your head)

Let’s say you want to lose weight but you have a belief that when you lose weight your marriage will fall apart. And of course you don’t want this.

Your belief that if you lose weight it will destroy your marriage is so scary, you pretty much can guaranty that you will fail at any attempt at losing weight...

I could go on, but I think you get the point.

So I’m just here to remind you to pay attention to the things you want and the beliefs you have about them because those “beliefs” may be the reason you haven’t achieved them yet. And, if those beliefs don't serve you in any way, or move in the direction you want to go, then change them! 

I DID IT!

After a full year of visualizing myself working in a field that I truly enjoy, it finally came true.  A year ago I listened to "The Secret" and it immediately transformed my life. I blogged about it previously- see: http://marisuggs.blogspot.com/2013/04/radical-change.html

So, up to a month and half ago I was working for insurance agency where I worked for 7 years, and I hated it, but after listening to the Secret and many other teachers, I realized that I was in control of my life and I took charge.

And boy did it pay off!  In the last year I've become the person I've always wanted to be. I feel better than I've ever felt, I'm healthy, I have a positive outlook on life, and now I'm on my way to having the career I so longed to have.  This is only the beginning. I have so many awesome plans, so many fun and interesting things I want to do that I can hardly contain my excitement.

If you want to change here are few things to consider. 

1. Be the change you want to see. Don't wait for the world to change, it most likely will never happen. However,  the great thing is that when you start looking at the world around you differently the world around you changes. So, change within, every little change will move you into a new and fabulous world/life.

2. Surround yourself with only things that bring you good feelings, in other words avoid things that stress you out. For me, it was the news. I haven't watched the news in a year. I used to watch it every day, three times a day, one of those being right before going to bed.  Not good, don't do it. 

3. Visualize!. Picture yourself being that person you want to be, act as if you are that person and before long you will be that person. 

4. Be grateful for what you do have. Every day when you wake up, before doing anything grab your journal and write down all the things you're grateful for. Aside from my health and my family, I always give thanks for my hands. Yeah my hands, they allow me to write. For my brain for it allows me to think and so on.

Anyway, these are just a few things I did that helped in gradually getting me to where I am today, which is radically different from who and where I was last year. 

Hope this helps you!

Are you a projector?

Are you a projector?


Well not in the way shown above, I mean in the way of projecting your issues onto others? I am so guilty of this. 

People. Please. Don't. Do. This. The other day I noticed I was a big offender of this behavior. Something pretty awesome happened; I got really good news from someone and then I started giving them irrelevant life advice.

Let me give you an example.  Let's say... you're single and hating it and a friend of yours (also single, but happy) comes to you and say's guess what friend? I just got a great job that pays a lot of money, I will be traveling and I will finally be doing just what I've always wanted to do. The correct response from you should be, Oh My God Becky I'm so happy for you, congratulations  (valley-girl voice).

The INCORRECT response would be. Becky that's great BUT, what about a relationship, I mean you know you have to think about what's really important in life, and that's love.

Ugh, that's projecting people!!! I tend to do that a lot. So, to all those who have been a victim of my madness I apologize. My issues are not yours. 

1. If I want to get healthy, I assume everyone wants to too and  I shove health literature down their throat. 
2. If I want to be all spiritual, I assume everyone must have a need for it too.
3. And one that I've done often...just because I was unhappy with my job, didn't mean everyone in the world was too. 

So remember to just be a good friend and a good listener. 

Start Living Your Life Fearlessly

Hello there, it's been a couple weeks since my last post, but it was due to an awesome transition in my life.  I moved from South Florida to Central Florida and I was getting settled in. This change has meant the world to me. 

Let me start at the beginning. On June 1, 2012, I had enough. Although I was happy with my home life and by all accounts should have been happy with the rest of my life, I wasn't. I was consumed by the thought of having no control over the outcome of my life. I didn't like thinking I was on autopilot. So that day, I decided to change. 

I started with something I heard about years ago, I purchased the audio book version of "The Secret" and just like that my life was transformed. 

I didn't stop there though, I couldn't stop listening to inspiring, motivating books and/or speakers. Soon I started to understand exactly how life worked. I realized that I HAD control over my life just by controlling my thought process. I realized I AM what I THINK about. (Also supported by Joel Osteen- for my Christian friends). Joel Osteen - Remove Bad Thoughts Sermon

Due to this change I got the courage to do many things. In the interest of time, I’ll only mention a few.

First and most important I started to see the world differently and started to see the good in everything and everyone. My entire outlook on life changed. I eliminated complaining from my life and focused only on the good in every situation. 

Secondly, I was able to make a life changing move. I am very close to my family, and although part of me always longed to travel or perhaps live in a different State, I never thought I could do it. I couldn't imagine living far away from my family; just the thought of it created deep guilt.

Finally, I had a stable job, with a good income and for me that was huge. And, although I wasn't happy at my job I couldn't leave because of the fear I felt of losing something so secure. 

BUT, with a lot of faith AND action I was able to do just what I thought I could never do. Three weeks ago I quit my job and relocated to Orlando. Although it's not my ideal location, it's a start in my endeavor to doing the things I want without feeling guilty. 

I encourage you to take chances and to not let fear hold you back. You never know what’s waiting for you when you go for it.

I am enjoying my new city immensely and to my surprise losing my income--that I thought I couldn’t do without--hasn't been so bad, in fact it’s been just fine. I’m taking some time off and it’s been great. I am spending lots of time focusing on my writing and spending time with my husband and kids, while getting to know my new city. I love it. 

 

 

Run! Even if Your Life Depends on It!

Imagine this. Imagine for one second that experts are telling you that what you want is IMPOSSIBLE, CAN’T BE DONE; you might even DIE if you do it.  

This is just what was told to the world once upon a time when it came to running a “certain” distance in a “certain” amount of time.

Prior to 1954 the world was made to believe that if you ran 1 mile in less than 4 minutes you would die. They said it was physically impossible to do so, and because this information came from the experts, everyone believed it and obliged.

That is, until a brave soul refused to believe in the limits the world had set for him.

I’m speaking of Sir. Roger Bannister.  He did what they said couldn’t be done.  He ran one mile in 3 minutes 59.4 seconds.

His record only lasted 46 days.  Once they saw how this barrier was only an illusion brought on by others it became an achievable goal.

I bring this to your attention because like many of us, there’s possibly something holding you back from achieving your most desired goals.

What are those obstacles that you or your inner circle has created for you? Break free!  Be like Roger Bannister, keep your eye on the ball and don’t sway for a minute from what you want.

I’d like to ask that if you have an experience like this to let me know. If you had a moment in your life where all the odds were against you, and everyone around you said it couldn’t be done but you did it anyway AND you came out on top, PLEASE share your story here. We all love hearing of others' success stories because it reminds us of how ours is just as achievable. Help in my journey to inspiring others.

Till next time.  And Remember....

Below are a few links for you to read about this incredible story.

http://www.encyclopedia.com/topic/Roger_Bannister.aspx

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_Bannister

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four-minute_mile

Lacking motivation? Look no further than YouTube!

So I realized something today. I noticed that whenever I’m lacking motivation I can simply turn things around my listening to something on YouTube that relates to whatever topic I’m struggling with. (I love YouTube BTW).

For example, I really want to eat healthy, I have finally come to a place in my life where it’s not really about a diet or just losing weight, but rather about feeling the best I can. It’s not about what NOT to eat but instead of what to eat that’s good for my body. 

If you’ve been following my blog you know that I recently decided to participate in the Disney Princess Half Marathon, well, let me tell you this is hard! But I think I’m psyching myself out. Every time I take a step my knee starts really hurting. I truly believe that eating the right foods will contribute immensely to my efforts in running this race. Including, fixing my knee problem.

Needless to say I was feeling really crappy about having Startbucks at lunch time and pasta with battered chicken last night for dinner.  My body is yelling “WHY WOMAN? WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO US WHEN YOU KNOW IT DOESN’T MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD”.

So because I’m not very savvy in the kitchen department (which is why I always end up eating bad stuff) I turned to my reliable friend YouTube. And there I found a lot of great tips on eating the right foods. But it is much more than that for me. Frankly you can go to any book store and look through any healthy cook book and you will probably find the same or better info. For me, listening to things on YouTube pumps me up, (NOT in the voice of Arnold Schwarzenegger). It’s like something stirs in me that is dormant and then suddenly I’m awake again.

Here are other things I listen to, Bio’s on writers and film makers. I listen to audio books on finances such as Rich Dad Poor Dad (Great Book).  Experts speaking about healthy eating/living and/or exercising; practically anything you need some extra encouragement on.

So I very much recommend that the next time you’re lacking motivation turn to a free site to lift you up.